Lying to Yourself
by Westerncat
Summary: "Oh contraire, Harley," He whispered into her ear "it is I who wouldn't know what to do without you, no matter how much I lie to myself." A oneshot continuation of Bruised Kisses.


**A/N: This is sort of like a long oneshot companion piece to **_**Bruised Kisses.**_** If you want you could read that one for this to make a little sense, but it isn't necessary. Again the Joker in here is based off of the comics.**

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**10:40 a.m.  
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He awoke to the dull throbbing pain of his bruised ribs from the night before, and groaned as the weight on top of him moved, causing the pain to double. He heard of squeak of 'sorry' and felt apologetic lips kiss his chest. He squeezed his eyes shut at the dull throb as he moved to sit up, but the feeling of his ribs shifting inside of him quickly stopped any further movement and he collapsed back against the pillow, breathing unevenly.

Harley was, as usual asking what was wrong with a panicked tone to her voice, making him roll his eyes under the lids.

He was fairly certain now that they weren't just bruised and were in fact, broken. He should have known, and in a sense he did. After all, coughing up a little blood didn't exactly mean your lungs and ribs were working in accordance anymore. He'd had broken ribs and punctured lungs so many times before that he'd lost count, but somehow this time it had slipped his mind that taking a metal pipe to the chest might actually shatter your rib cage instead of just lightly bruising it. He just figured the rage he was in at the time while he brutally killed the wannabe thugs just made him forget for the time being, and the residual adrenaline running through him lessened the pain. That aside, he wasn't at all sure how he had let them hit him in the first place.

All that mattered now was that the dickheads were dead.

He sucked in a breath and touched his chest gingerly, hoping to position his ribs so he could move a little. He heard Harley gasp as she watched him, it was then he stupidly realized he wasn't thinking about the fact that she would be quick to suspect something wrong. He felt Harley move in front of him on the bed, with her now suspicious gaze looking him over in a mix of worry, anger and adoration.

"Puddin', your ribs are actually broken aren't they?" He opened his eyes to see her staring down at him with her hands on her hips. She bravely reached down and touched his chest where he was clutching, and a pained, impulsive slap of her hand answered her question rather quickly. He gritted his teeth in anger at her inquisitiveness and knew he wouldn't be hearing the end of this. Clasping her stinging hand, she glared at him, looking as if she could spit fire. He bared his teeth at her in a modest grin, wordlessly willing her to try and hurt him more than he already was.

Besides, he remembered that he had put off hurting her last night for this morning anyway.

She muttered something along the lines of 'why didn't I put two and two together' and jumped up off of the bed, before heading to the bathroom. He mentally slapped himself as he realized what she was looking for, and closed his eyes once more as she gasped. Why hadn't he run the water a little longer?

"Mistah' J! Why the hell didn't you tell me you were _really_ hurt? Dammit, you've been coughin' up blood. You need to rest and heal up." She rushed back out tying a pink robe around herself, her blonde locks cascading down her shoulders just stopping above her cleavage. As much as he enjoyed that view, his jaw tightened in annoyance and he exhaled slowly, trying to come up with something that could get him out of the impending spiel of him trying to be safe.

Blah, blah, blah.

All ideas escaped him as a balled up towel was thrown at him, smacking him in the head.

"If you told me last night I wouldn't have bothered you, you big jerk." She came back and stood in front of him, ignoring the venomous glare he flashed in her general direction.

"Well, you weren't about to stop last night were you. You were all over me the moment I came in here. I'm fine trust me, I've had a lot worse my dear. You of all people should know that." He hoped that she would just drop this little matter and get through the day, but he would have to be naive to believe so. With arms across her chest she pursed her lips together, looking worried and rather unconvinced as a weak cough escaped his throat the moment he stopped talking. He slammed his fist down on the bed suddenly in anger, causing Harley to jump a bit but she quickly regained her stance as his eyes flickered back to hers.

"I do hope you know that with your condition, you won't be going out like that Puddin'." She crossed her arms tighter with a look that dared him to say something in rebuttal. He glared at her incredulously hardly missing the determination set in her gaze and she in turn, swallowed a small lump that was forming in her throat at the fire that his neon green eyes were sending her way. It was as if she could feel his fingers tightening around her neck already. He could tell she knew she was over stepping her boundaries and he watched as she tried to backpedal a bit. He finally sat up and swung his legs over the bed and smiled sweetly making her eyes widen, ever so slightly.

"Uh, who exactly, do you think you are talking to? Could it be that I've taken something you've said the wrong way? If so, silly me, but I distinctly remember _you_ telling _me_ that I _wasn't_ going to do something. Is that correct?" He leaned forward and looked at the floor, grimacing to himself as he felt a rib move out of place. It didn't go as unnoticed as he wanted, but he remained hell bent on trying to intimidate her.

"I'm just trying to look out for your well-being Mistah J, come on. You are going to kill yourself. Don't take this the wrong way." She said seriously, her voice catching a little making him look up at her to see her eyes glistening with ready to spill tears.

_God, how he hated when she had to cry about every little thing!_

In the back of his mind he knew she meant well, and he knew that she loved him with all of her annoying little soul, but he had no desire to sit back and let a woman, or anyone else for that matter, tell _him_, what to do. He stood up slowly, trying his best to make sure his ribs didn't shift any further, because he could swear he could feel one digging into his left lung.

"I appreciate your concern Harley girl, I really do. But just because I may have a few broken ribs doesn't mean that I am out of commission. I've had my ribs broken by Bats so many times before for something as simple as this to stop me." He hardened his gaze towards her, hoping to get the point across for her to stop worrying, and leave him alone. Too dumb, he reasoned, to understand the message between the lines, she shook her head 'no' and motioned towards the bed.

"No sir. You are going to lie down and let your ribs heal properly." She wiped at a tear that had fallen and crossed her arms once more.

She had a point, dammit.

It wasn't about just letting them heal; it was about setting them and not moving in position that would compromise that healing. He walked over to her, trying to banish the strong urge to hurt her. He gritted his teeth and tried hard to keep his cool, and he realized with horror he was becoming soft, letting Harley get away with telling him what to do. Really now!

As he moved closer to her, he could tell she was trembling with fear, and an unfamiliar feeling settled in his chest making him want to stop that fear. Eliminate the fear he caused!

Preposterous.

He shook his head in disgust and quickly wrapped his fingers around her throat and squeezed, smiling in satisfaction as she reached up, trying to loosen his grip. She gasped earnestly, hoping to get a good breath as tears rolled down her cheeks, dragging her white makeup with it. She looked so pitiful, and she usually took his acts of violence on herself in pride, but this time there was something different. He wasn't beating her up for being stupid; he was beating her up for caring about his health.

His grip loosened, and Harley gasped taking in a lungful of air. He finally let go, thoroughly pissed at himself for feeling . . . _dare he say it_ . . . guilt. He just walked back over to the bed and collapsed atop it, hurting his ribs further in the process. He tried not to care, but already hurt considering the circumstances, his ribs cracked in even more. He let out a groan and wrapped his arms around himself and wished with all of his being that his reputation of being menacingly scary hadn't just gone down the tubes, just because his Hench-wench cared about him, and he finally realized it. Finally realized he was being stupid for taking his anger out on her for just being there when he actually needed her.

Dear God, what was happening to him!

Harley made excellent time in running to the bathroom and grabbing bandages before speeding to his side in a matter of seconds. She helped him up into a sitting position and began to unravel the gauze. He kept his eyes to the floor, feeling her eyes on him. He knew she was questioning what had just happened, but she smartly kept her thoughts silent. She leaned forward and wrapped the bandages around his chest, trying to ignore his gasps of pain and curses. She had just witnessed something she never thought she would have; her Puddin' had just stopped himself from hurting her. Where had that come from all of a sudden?

He looked like he was going to enjoy it like he usually did, but then a war had been going on behind his eyes and that in itself had frightened her.

"There, Mistah J. All better." She finished wrapping the bandages tightly around his chest, and sat back to assess her work. She watched his shallow breathing and studied his face while he had his eyes closed. Lines of pain were etched into his face but they were not nearly as pronounced as someone else in his shoes would have been. She reached up and touched the side of his face gently, making him open his eyes to peer at her.

"I'm sorry Puddin', for talking to you like that earlier. I just want to make sure you're ok. I don't know what I'd do without you." She smiled as he reached up and grasped her hand with his, before taking it an brushing his lips over it, apologetically.

He opened his mouth for a moment, about to say something, but it died off as Harley leaned in and stole his lips. He didn't have to say a word. His actions said more than he ever could.

He was taken aback for a split second, but he quickly regained his senses and pressed himself into her kiss, tasting the strawberries that her lipstick was made of.

His favorite.

He realized he could be as cruel as he wanted with the public of Gotham, but here where, weather he wanted to admit it or not, his heart lie; he needed to appreciate the woman that devoted her entire life to him a little more. He smoothed her hair from her face, wiping away tears of joy that steadily streamed down her face as she smiled into his kiss.

They finally pulled apart in part for the necessity of air, accompanied with urges that might not have been easily controlled had they went much further. With Harley resting her head gently on his chest while he stroked her soft hair, he figured he could use a few more days like this.

"Oh contraire, Harley," He whispered into her ear "it is I who wouldn't know what to do without you, no matter how much I lie to myself."

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**A/N 2: Well, I just felt like **_**Bruised Kisses**_** needed a little something to follow it up and so this was assigned. I tried to make sure I didn't make the Joker too gushy, and too emotional because he is a really hard character to write, but I wanted to get the point across that even though he is a cold blooded killer to everyone else, he was still a human and needs to love, and be loved just like everybody else. And this time his (actually) broken ribs and annoying little Harley helped him realize it.**

**PS. I don't actually recommend wrapping ones chest tightly when they have broken ribs. What I wrote here wasn't medical advice by any means.**

**There will be more Batman stuff by me in the future, because ever since I had the fortune to play Batman: Arkham Asylum and Arkham City, it awakened a love that I didn't really know existed. I remember watching Batman:TAS as a kid and I guess it had originally started there I just didn't know it. I don't particularly care for Nolan's take on Batman so I won't exactly write in that genre, unless something changes my mind, and from the looks of it, that isn't going to happen. My favorite character from the Batman universe would have to be, Joker and Harley Quinn (Obviously), The Riddler and Ra's Al Ghul.**


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